Positive Parental Influence

Parent Involvement

Products by Jerry Johnson Triple Pitch Softball DVD The Drop Ball DVD

Pitching coach and author of The Triple Pitch DVD

Many parents live their dreams through their kids, and, in this instance, their daughters. I have one rule for moms and dads when they bring their daughter to me for the first pitching lesson - I inform them in a polite, tactful manner that their daughter for the next 30 -120 minutes belongs to me.

The parents are allowed, and encouraged, to stay in the pitching room to observe and can ask any questions they may have when the session is complete. The parents must have total confidence in what I am trying to accomplish with their daughter.

I have had girls tell me they have been dissatisfied with pitching and sports as a whole because of their parents’ unwanted involvement. As a pitching coach, I can certainly relate to their frustrations and resentments. I have had dads call me two or three weeks before the Little League season starts wanting to know if I can have their daughter ready to pitch when she has never done a windmill! There are parents who think you can just pick up a ball and throw strikes immediately. Some parents have looked at me after the second or third pitching lesson and say, “I had no idea pitching was this hard!”

All of my students are given a packet of information at their first session. This packet contains information on nutrition, conditioning, drills, training, injuries and many more topics. I tell the parents, along with the pitching student, that we are all in this together to make the girl the best pitcher possible. We are partners.

The parents and the pitcher are told that what she (the pitcher) does in my pitching room with me is just a small part of what she must do on her own. It takes a huge commitment on the part of the daughter as well as the parents in order for her to become a good pitcher. That is positive involvement. The parents must ensure that she is doing all of the drills, and practicing a minimum of four days a week, as a beginning pitcher. Pitching is hard work and requires a very big commitment on everyone’s part.

Parents sometimes want and expect “too much, too soon” from their children in all sports. I have had parents ask me as soon as the second lesson “when is she going to throw strikes?” This is putting a lot pressure on this young nine or ten year old. As a parent it is important to be a positive influence and to encourage your kids to keep practicing and the pitches will get better over time. Just be patient.

It’s very important for the parents to understand what their daughter must do in order to do the pitching drills correctly. I want and encourage the parents to be in the pitching cage when I explain snaps, speed and many other drills with their daughter so they can make sure she does them correctly when she is practicing on her own. I stress that the drills must be done correctly or she will pitch incorrectly. Again, that is positive involvement.

Parents do not start out with the intention of making the daughter’s pitching, or other sports related activity, a miserable experience. Most parents are truly interested in their girl's best interests, enjoy being involved in their activities, and want to support them. However, sometimes they get too intensely involved, and support turns to pressure. This is when the involvement becomes negative.

Parents are involved with their daughters at a very young age; they start in tee ball volunteering at the concession stand, field maintenance, keeping the score books, coaching and any other duties that are asked of them. Youth sports require a great deal of parental involvement, but by the time they reach the high school level it almost comes to an end. Parents have a very difficult time adjusting to the fact that their daughter needs very little involvement and have a difficult time accepting that someone else is in charge of coaching or teaching their daughter.

I have been giving pitching lessons at times when a parent says to their daughters, “How many times does Jerry have to tell you the same thing over and over?” This is embarrassing to the young woman and frustrating for me as the pitching coach. This is also another example of negative involvement. After hearing a comment like this I will normally stop to take a short break and remind the parent, one-on-one, what was agreed upon during the first practice session. I reiterate that I must do the coaching and correcting and the parent must sit and observe or go to the mall and return when the session is over.

Parents need to be supportive and let the coaches do the coaching. We have the same goal in mind. The goal is that the pitcher excels to her highest potential and that the sport creates a positive influence in her life. If both of these things are achieved the parent has exhibited positive parental influence on their daughter.

Jerry Johnson, inventor of the Triple Pitch, has coached at every level of softball and has over 30 years of coaching experience in the sport. Most recently, he served as the pitching coach for Mountain State University in West Virginia. He now devotes his full attention to giving private pitching lessons and organizing and participating in pitching clinics throughout Southern West Virginia.